A little over a year ago, I
took part in a labyrinth walk as part of the “Capstone” class at JBU. My intention of posting my writings from that class on this blog
failed after about a month…but I wanted to go back and post the response I was
asked to write about the labyrinth walk (edited a bit). This is because a
couple weeks ago God put together several puzzle pieces in my life, including this
experience from last March. To read more about the picture I saw take shape
from the pieces, check out this post on my other blog.
A bit of background: The
Capstone class primarily looked at six “streams” or traditions of Christian
history/practice.[1] I’ll
have to do a post some time with a bit about those. As part of our examinations
into these types of orthopraxy,[2]
we also had speakers come in or outside experiences. The latter included the
labyrinth walk.
Labyrinth response written March 6, 2013
I wasn’t quite sure what to expect from the labyrinth
experience. To be honest, I was apprehensively looking forward to it. {The
apprehension part came from preconceptions I had and opinions I had heard expressed
about such things.}
I am really glad you {Dr. Burch – a great teacher!} went over the idea of
the labyrinth some on Wednesday before we went out there {on Sunday, March 3}.
I had expected it to be more structured, for Ben Hill {the homeowner who had
built a labyrinth in his yard} to give us more specific “how to” suggestions so
we would do it the right way. Of course, looking back, I realize that idea
deals with one of my misconceptions…that things such as this are some sort of
magic charm that you go through the right steps and get the perfect result. It
makes sense that he did not give us specific guidelines, because this is more
of a personal experience. At the same time, I appreciated the basic suggestion
you had given us about going in with our hands closed and coming out with them
open.
Going into the experience, I had a good bit on my
mind. On Thursday, I had a very low-point, sad experience and a more exciting,
happy occurrence. With the former, there were questions of “why did this have
to happen this way???” and with the latter, there were questions of “how will
this application turn out? Will I get the internship that seems so perfect to
me?” I knew that in both, God had a plan and had His reasons, even if I
couldn’t see or understand them. But I always tend to question why—I always
want to know what it is that will happen.
So that’s what I was holding onto as I entered the
labyrinth. God has been asking me a simple question over and over throughout
the past year and a half or so: “Do you trust Me?” Usually my mind jumps to the
“yes” answer, and then I try to align my emotions to that truth. But at other
times I honestly have to say “no,” and then try to surrender whatever it is
that I am trying to hold onto control of.
During
the first few minutes {of the labyrinth walk} I was thinking through all of
that. Then a verse “just happened” to pop into my mind: “What does the Lord
require of you? But to do justice, to love mercy, and to walk humbly before
your God” (the Esther paraphrase). My mind latched onto the “walk humbly” bit,
wondering what that really meant in practicality. I continued thinking about
other things, and then suddenly right as I was making one of the turns I nearly
stood stock still – because the truth of that really struck me.
Thinking that I deserve to know why things happen the
way they do—or wanting so badly to know what will happen ahead of time—is a
sign of pride. God calls us to walk humbly before Him – that includes trusting
Him and surrendering our “right” to know why and our ideal plans and dreams.
For
most of the rest of the walk in, I was reflecting on that and confessing the
sin of pride that I hadn’t really recognized before then. In the center—and
then coming back out—I mostly prayed for the willingness to learn more of
Christ’s humility. And I was able to just spend some time worshipping too,
singing songs of praise in my mind. As I neared the exit, another thought came…
“This is not the end goal, this is simply the preparation.” The fact is, I
don’t know what’s going to happen in my life. What I do know is that God is
transforming me to fulfill His purposes. And I truly am thankful that He’s the
one in charge of all that and not me!
~~~~
So so true! And still such a
lesson I need to be taken back to and reminded of over and over again….
[1]
The six, in the order we covered them in class, are: Contemplative {think monks/meditation},
Holiness {think Methodists}, Charismatic {obvious}, Social Justice {think “liberal”…to
some extent}, Evangelical {what I considered “the best”/“mainstream” five years ago}, and
Incarnational {think Episcopal}.
[2] “Orthopraxy”
has to do with what a group of people views as correct religious practices. It can be compared/contrasted
with “orthodoxy” – what a group of people views as correct religious beliefs.
No comments:
Post a Comment